By Jen Barraza
If you think theatre reviews are best served with a side of sass and a generous pour of Chardonnay, then you need to meet Kiki & Lucy—Boca’s most fabulous, wine-loving theatre connoisseurs. With impeccable taste (in both performances and pinot), these two have made a name for themselves by reviewing shows and specialty drinks while sipping their way through the experience. We sat down with the dynamic duo for a no-holds-barred Q&A, covering everything from Broadway dream roles to proper theatre etiquette.
Spoiler alert: They have opinions. Grab a glass and enjoy the conversation!
1. Ladies, let’s start with the essentials—what’s the secret to a proper theatre and specialty cocktail review?
Kiki: Well, first, I have to say ya gotta know your cocktails. Ya gotta know what you like and what ya don’t like. For instance, Lucy does not like anything that’s too… what, Lucy?
Lucy: Bitter. Is what I would say…but what I do love is to start out with a nice chardonnay…a chardonnay to cleanse the palette and loosen the lips.
Kiki: If our lips are loose, we will talk and talk.
2. And how many glasses of Chardonnay does it take before a review gets really honest?
Kiki: Ha ha ha! I’m so glad you asked that. That’s hilarious. We try to keep it down to five glasses. Ha ha!
Lucy: Oh! I was gonna say three…
Kiki: Well, it’s true, at three we do get honest, that’s for sure.
Lucy: We get down and dirty, the white wine really helps us dissect the drink, the show, our favorite actors…
Kiki: talking about all those washboard abs…
Lucy: …about the music, talking about the director, the costumes, the scenery, the props…we love it all!
Kiki: How many glasses have you had already today?
Lucy: Oh…a lady never reveals that!
Kiki: Uh huh. So, how many glasses have you had?
3. Theatre etiquette is important. What are Kiki & Lucy’s official dos and don’ts for attending a show?
Lucy: Don’t bring your phone!
Kiki: …don’t open your candies…
Lucy: …but do bring a drink from the Art Bar!
Kiki: …goes without saying.
4. If Broadway called and wanted you both to star in a show together, what would it be?
Kiki: Oh, I love that question!!
Lucy: Me, too!
Kiki: I think our best show together would be…
Lucy: …yes!
Both: Mame!!!
Lucy (singing): “you coax the blues right out of the horn”
Both (singing): “Mame!”
Kiki: Oh my gosh, can you imagine? Kiki and Lucy on Broadway!
Lucy: Yes, and we could share the roles of Mame and Vera.
Kiki: We would be davoon!
5. If you were cast in a musical about your own lives, what would it be called, and what would the opening number sound like?
Kiki: It would be called The Kiki and Lucy Show, of course!
Both: (singing their theme song) “It’s the Kiki and Lucy Shoooow!”
Lucy: Oh my gosh, yes! It would take place on the beach in Boca.
Kiki: Absolutely! And we would have all these drinks brought to us by beautiful cabana boys!
Lucy: Oh, and we would do numbers on the beach like… um…like Gidget or a Frankie and Annette movie.
Kiki: Yes. So the songs would be like…
*They both start humming different tunes from a variety of musical styles. (indecipherable)
Kiki: Well, we don’t know what it would sound like…
Lucy: …but it would be fun.
6. You’ve sipped, swirled, and reviewed many specialty cocktails at the theatre. What’s the best and worst drink you’ve ever had here?
Kiki: You expect us to remember the names of all those drinks?
Lucy: We’ve had so many… that one from Churchill was so good! Smokey.
Kiki: Like a cigar flavored bourbon… oh, and I remember there was one that tasted like a garden in my mouth! Do you remember that, Lucy?
Lucy: How could I forget? I was in the splash zone! By the end of the show, I was wearing your drink!
7. What’s one show at the Phoenix Theatre Company you saw that left you absolutely speechless (or, heaven forbid, sober)?
Kiki: Oh, I can tell you I was absolutely speechless at the end of Jenna’s big number in Waitress. What was that number called?
Lucy: “She Used to be Mine.”
Kiki: Yes! Cassie Chilton was beyond davoon!
Lucy: My favorite was that Mamas and the Papas musical.
Kiki: Oh, that was many, many years ago.
Lucy: Oh my gosh, I was just a young lady of the American Theatre…
Kiki: Mmmmhmmm. *sips chardonnay
8. Who is the best leading lady of all time, and which leading man would you like to share a scene with?
Kiki: Best leading lady of all time? Miss Patti Lupone!
Lucy: Oh, you’re right Kiki, I saw her in Gypsy and she was unreal. But, a close second to me is Phoenix’s own… Alyssa Chiarello!
Kiki: Davoon! She is Phoenix’s Patti Lupone!
Lucy: Now who do you want to share a scene with, Kiki?
Kiki: Oh, well if it were local, I would have to say one Caleb Reese!
Lucy: You took mine!
Kiki: Oh! He’s got that long hair. He’s got that rocker sensibility about him…
Lucy: …and I want to share…
Kiki: …his bed?!
Lucy: No! Kiki! The stage!
Kiki: Oh. Ha ha! Ok, next question.
Lucy: There’s another one?
9. If you could invite three Broadway legends (alive or in spirit) to a girls’ night out, who would they be, and what’s the first round of drinks?
Kiki: Well, for me they’re all dead…
Lucy: Come on, are you kidding me? What about Liza Minelli?
Kiki: She’s not dead? Ha! I kid! I kid! I know she’s not dead. No, for me, Chita Rivera has to be there. Angela Lansbury…
Lucy: …and Carol Channing.
Kiki: Oh! Carol Channing!! I’m kicking Angela Lansbury off of the table because I also must have Elaine Stritch!
Lucy: Oh, Elaine Stritch. Talk about fun!
Both: (breaking into song) Here’s to the laaaadies who lunch. Everybody rise! Rise!
Kiki: And what would we drink?
Lucy: A martini, of course!
10. Lastly, please tell us a fun fact about yourself.
Kiki: Can we tell it about the other person? Lucy has the hairiest legs I’ve ever seen! Ha ha! She shaves but sometimes…
Lucy: …sometimes it gets cold outside. But let me tell you about Kiki. She’s got the biggest mouth this side of the Mississippi!
Kiki: I don’t think that’s a secret. Ha! Alright, that’s enough about us.
Lucy: Thanks for the interview! Bye!!!
Whether they’re sipping Chardonnay, breaking into song, or delivering their unfiltered takes on theatre and specialty cocktails, one thing is certain—Kiki & Lucy know how to make a night at the theatre extra entertaining. Follow their hijinks on The Phoenix Theatre Company’s social channels.
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